Did Not Notice It
by ZareEraz
Summary: Fem!Watanuki. Watanuki receives New Year's cards from her friends and reminisces about their time together and about how much they've affected her life.


A/N: Happy New Year's everyone! I want to thank all of you for supporting me for the last year as I've written stories for xxxHolic! I also hope to have your continued support for future stories and want you to know how much I appreciate hearing from you and seeing you like my fics! Enjoy this little New Year's story and have a fantastic year! ;3

Did Not Notice It

"Once you notice something, you can never return to the time when you did not notice it." – Haruka Doumeki

Watanuki Kimihiro awoke on January 1st to a light snow storm just outside her apartment window. She rolled over on her side and picked up her glasses, sliding the spectacles onto her nose. Blinking away sleep, the seer sat up and looked out her window, lazily watching the snow flutter down onto her balcony. She smiled. It was a good sign to start the New Year with a smile. She stretched her arms up to work out all the kinks she'd gotten during sleep and stood up to make herself a cup of tea. The first of the New Year. Watanuki set about padding around her kitchen, still in her pajamas and bedhead, and prepared herself a nice, warming cup of tea to sit with and watch the snow for a little.

Once she had finished her cup, she got dressed and went outside to check her mailbox for New Year's postcards. She was always excited to get _nengajo_ now, because now she actually and friends to sent her cards every New Year (1). In the years before she went to high school, she never received any. Watanuki walked down the stairs to the apartment's wall of mailboxes and took out the key to hers to open it. Inside lay a small pile of _nengajo_ addressed to her, their brightly colored paper lighting up her face. Watanuki smiled and snatched up her postcards and hugged them to her chest, so happy to have gotten so many this year. She shut her mailbox with a click and ran back up the stairs to her apartment to read them. Kicking off her shoes at the _genkan_ , she dashed to the kitchen table to lay out her cards, shrugging off her coat hurriedly one arm at a time and taking a seat.

She grabbed the first card and smiled, knowing exactly who it was from. Maru's and Moro's card was pink and had pictures drawn all over it because they couldn't write – pictures of happy monkeys (for the zodiac animal of the year) and fireworks and the bells that had rung in the New Year last night and their faces in lieu of signatures. Watanuki giggled to herself, remembering the first time she'd ever met the twins and how they had dragged her into Yuko's receiving room very unceremoniously and then proceeded to tease her and repeat everything she said. Their carefree personalities had been a great blessing to the seer, cheering her up when Yuko and Mokona become insufferable and sweet when they took time to drag her into a game they were playing. Watanuki placed their card to the side softly and went to see who else had offered her good wishes for the year.

The next card didn't have good wishes for her per say, but it did have wishes of a sort that made Watanuki want to yell at the sender. Mokona's card was decorated professionally with lots and lots of White and Black Mokonas, all dancing and singing around the edges of the _nengajo_ , and after saying Happy New Year, the little fur ball demanded that Watanuki come over to the shop and get the sake and sour plums for a snack, the signature at the bottom an inky footprint. Watanuki growled at the card and tossed it over with Maru's and Moro's.

The next card was from Zashiki-Warishi and Ame-Warishi, the postcard decorated tastefully with cherry blossoms and neat penmanship.

 _Dear Watanuki,_

 _We hope this year bodes well for you! We can't wait to see you again and hope that you are having a Happy New Year._

 _Zashiki-Warishi_

 _Hope your New Year's is great and don't make a fool out of yourself._

 _Ame-Warishi_

 _If you make her cry you'll be in for it! Oh…and Happy New Year._

 _The Tengu_

Watanuki put that one to the side hoping that Zashiki-Warishi hadn't cried when she'd gotten the _nengajo_ the girl had sent her because if she did…well, she was going to have some very unhappy visitors soon. Which was exciting (if a little painful) just like all the meetings with the sprites and the Tengu because Watanuki somehow always make Zashiki-Warishi cry and the Tengu would chase her around with their fans until one of the sprites stopped them, usually with Ame-Warishi calling Watanuki a fool or an idiot for some reason or another.

The next card was from Doumeki and Watanuki had to hand it to her boyfriend…he had fantastic handwriting. Doumeki's card was done on high quality paper and he'd drawn several handsome monkeys hanging from tree branches and a pool at the bottom that looked suspiciously like Haruka's pond at the temple.

 _Dear Watanuki,_

 _I hope the coming year favors you well and I hope our relationship continues to bloom like the coming spring. Don't get into as much trouble this year as you did in the last._

 _Can you make croquettes the next time you do lunch?_

 _Shizuka Doumeki_

Watanuki scowled at the neat handwriting and was tempted to swear at the nengajo, but that wouldn't help anything. Doumeki was just being himself: half annoying and half looking out for her like he always did. It was a strange dynamic to their relationship that Watanuki had never figured out. He loved to annoy the hell out of her with his outlandish food requests and always butting into her conversations with Wari, but then the other half of the time he was by her side, protecting her and keeping her from basically dying. She depended on both sides of Doumeki to set her straight now, rolling along and yelling at the annoying side, but cherishing the side that cared for her. Watanuki set his card aside softly and reached for the last _nengajo_ she'd received for the New Year.

It was Yuko's. The witch's card was blank except for a crescent moon and an elaborate butterfly poised in the corner. Her handwriting was graceful and artful (unlike Watanuki's own which tended to get a little squiggly when her hand got tired) and took up most of the card for her message.

Dear Watanuki,

 _Happiness to you on the dawn of the New Year! May your year be prosperous and kind, and may you make lots of snacks! Mokona and I will be off-world for a little while so be sure to go to the shop and check on the girls to make sure they're having a happy New Year too! (And there will be lots of cleaning for you to do when I get back!)_

 _Yuko_

Watanuki would've strangled the witch if she'd been nearby but then again, just like Doumeki, Yuko was being Yuko, keeping the girl on her toes and one step behind. It was something that Watanuki always expected, even if she didn't know specifically what to expect. It was like making life miserable and complicated for Watanuki was Yuko's own way of making her diverse life that much more interesting. It was an understanding between the witch and the seer: the witch would fulfill the girl's need for purpose and grant her wish, and Watanuki would do what Yuko asked of her (to a certain degree). It was and exchange. But Watanuki couldn't help but noticed after a while that Yuko carried a small sadness with her, something that lurked behind her evil smiles, her flamboyant outfits and knack for knowing pretty much everything. A sadness that Watanuki hoped to one day understand when Yuko was ready to tell the girl where she'd come from and how her own shop came to be.

Watanuki set her last card aside and sighed to herself. She loved all the cards she'd received, but there was one card that she'd wanted to see but didn't have. Wari hadn't sent her a card. Watanuki frowned to herself but then shook her head. Wari was probably just too busy visiting family and celebrating the holidays and forgotten to send her a card. It wasn't a big deal…maybe. But she wouldn't let it get her down. She had a whole day to spend relaxing! She wasn't needed at the shop until tomorrow unless she wanted to see Maru and Moro and she was pretty sure that they'd like to spend the day having the shop to themselves anyway. Watanuki picked up her melancholy and chucked it out the window for the moment. She was going to make herself a feast for once and enjoy her downtime while everyone was out of town! And that's how she spent the rest of January first, indulging herself.

Surprisingly enough, Watanuki's disappointment in not receiving a postcard from Wari was averted when it showed up on her doorstep with a very apologetic postman bowing and saying with sincerest apologies that this particular postcard had been lost in the mail in all the rush to deliver the nengajo. Watanuki thanked the postman and told him not to worry about it, a small smile on her face. She closed her door and looked at the card, flipping it over in her hands. It was one of those shop printed cards with the New Year's animal on it, the monkey. The monkey was stretched across the short end of the postcard, with his outreaching paw and tail curling around the sides. It was from Wari. The card was addressed to her in Wari's handwriting and had a printed greeting for good wishes and luck in the coming year. On the bottom, there was a small note in Wari's handwriting telling the girl that he wished this card found her well and he was doing well also, having visited his grandparent's house over the holiday break. Wari said he hoped to see her soon and signed his name.

Watanuki held the card carefully, her fingers trembling. She had been so upset when Wari hadn't sent her a card, even if they saw each other most days, but it still hurt a little to get cards from everyone else (even Yuko who was off-world) and not get a card from one of her closest friends. And now she had it, and she realized that by Wari actually writing on the card, a little of his bad luck and stuck to the paper, the ink, and it had gotten lost in the mail because of it. That was the saddest part of all: the fact that Wari thought of her and sent her a card with his good wishes to her and it didn't arrive on time because of some curse that he's carried his entire life. A single tear welled up in Watanuki's eye, spilling over her eyelashes and falling onto the postcard, smearing the ink of the character for wishes.

Now that Watanuki knew of her friend's curse, she could never unlearn it, she could never forget the moment she fell out the window because of it and she couldn't help thinking off all the times it got in the way of her jobs or her friendship with Wari or the fact that Wari could never make anything himself to give to people or cook without there being consequences or even hug a friend. It was all impossible without some sort of repercussion and yet, Wari still tried. He sent cards on New Year's, he purchased food from the store to share with his friends, when someone was hurt or needed comfort, he was there…just an inch away from reaching out and touching. Watanuki squeezed her eyes shut and held the card close to her chest, hoping that someday Wari would find happiness, even with his curse. She wished it with all her heart before taking Wari's treasured postcard and placing it with the other cards she'd received from the people she loved. They were small gestures of kindness and good cheer, but she loved them no matter how cookie-cutter they were or how short they were or how infuriating they could be. They represented the hopes of her friends, and that was all that mattered.

She couldn't go back to the time when she'd been so oblivious as not to see the sadness in Yuko's mischievous smile, or the fear in Wari's attempts at contributing, or the worry that lurked behind Doumeki's eyes every time she did something dangerous or stupid. They were always there and Watanuki knew that she probably had a desperation to be a part of something whenever she cooked for Yuko, talked to Wari and held Doumeki's hand. It was something they all shared, something they didn't want others to see even if they saw it anyway. But that's why they stuck together, for the most part, because they weren't perfect (even though Yuko liked to think she was). They were just trying to live the best way they could, and being with each other made it a little better somehow. Eventually, they may all leave each other behind and while Watanuki hoped that would never happen, it still could. So, she wanted to make their limited time together mean something…be something special. No matter how long or how short it would be, she would make it last.

Watanuki's fingers lingered over her postcards, tracing the words written on the paper before walking away to get ready to go to the shop. She wondered to herself if they had gotten her cards as well and if they kept them too. She hoped so, otherwise Doumeki was going to get an earful from her and she'd scold Yuko until the witch until she ordered her to do something like cleaning and then she'd grumble about it for a while after that. She couldn't control Maru or Moro or Mokona, so she'd have to leave them alone if they didn't keep her cards, and she'd be nice to Wari. That's just the way it was. Watanuki got dressed and put her hair up in her usual pony tail, fixing the blue ribbon around her black hair until it was secure. She nodded to herself in the mirror and then left the bathroom to go put on her coat. As she went out the door and locked it behind her, a light snowfall started again, beginning to fill in the girl's footprints in the snow as she passed. She made new footprints, her shoes crunching through the snow as she walked towards the shop.

If someone followed those footprints, they might find themselves at and empty lot in between two office buildings, wondering why the footsteps disappeared without going anywhere.

Or they might come to an odd shop with a young woman sweep off the front walk, trying to clear a path through the snow. But was only if they had a wish as strong as hers had been, and if they wanted it granted, just like hers was starting to be.

 _Dear Wari…_

 _Dear Maru and Moro…_

 _Dear Mokona…_

 _Dear Ame-Warishi and Zashiwarishi…_

 _Dear Yuko…_

 _Dear Doumeki…_

 _Kotoshi mo yoroshiku o-negai-shimasu…I hope for your favour again in the coming year._

 _I want to thank you for being my friend…_

 _I want to thank you for playing and singing with me…_

 _I want to thank you for annoying me…_

 _I want to thank you for befriending me…_

 _I want to thank you for taking me in and giving me a place to belong…_

 _I want to thank you for loving me…_

 _I would not be here if it weren't for you, I would not be the person I am at the end of this year and the beginning of the new without your presence in my life. I want to wish you happiness and success in the New Year and hope to continue to be your friend. I would not be who I am today if I hadn't met you, hadn't been able to share many meals and experiences with you. It was inevitability that we would meet and cross our threads and we will continue to change and change each other and that's okay. I am truly thankful to have been able to meet you in this old year and I want to meet you again with the coming of the new spring. Until we meet again,_

 _Kimihiro Watanuki_

End

A/N: There you go! I hope you all had a great year and are ready for the new one!

Note 1: Nengajo are Japanese postcards that are sent out on January first. They're the Japanese version of Christmas cards and the post office makes sure they're delivered on the first if they're posted within the time limit (between mid-December) and are marked as nengajo. The cards themselves can be had drawn on, store bought or a combination of both. Common cards have the animal zodiac sign on them for the year or may feature popular Japanese animation character or Disney characters like Minnie and Mickey. _Nengajo_ are a chance to let people you don't meet very often know how you're doing and wish them a Happy New Year and are an excellent opportunity to showcase traditional calligraphy.

Greetings on _nengajo_ include:

 _kotoshi mo yoroshiku o-negai-shimasu_ (今年もよろしくお願いします **?** ) (I hope for your favour again in the coming year)

 _(shinnen) akemashite o-medetō-gozaimasu_ ((新年)あけましておめでとうございます **?** ) (Happiness to you on the dawn [of a New Year])

 _kinga shinnen_ (謹賀新年 **?** ) (Happy New Year)

 _gashō_ (賀正 **?** ) (to celebrate January)

 _shoshun/hatsuharu_ (初春 **?** ) (literally "early spring", in the traditional lunar calendar a year begins in early spring)

 _geishun_ (迎春 **?** ) (to welcome spring)

And on a side note: I like to think of Watanuki's wish as kind of a twofold thing which factors into how I worded her "thank yous" to everyone. Watanuki's wish is to not be able to see spirits anymore; she wants them to leave her alone. This tells us something about her: not only does she want to be like everyone else, she wants to be a part of some sort of group or community, because wanting to be "normal" implies that she doesn't want to be different, and therefore can integrate into a community that would finally accept her for being like everyone else. Therefore, in the granting of her wish, Watanuki met people like Yuko, Doumeki, Wari Ame-Warishi, Zashiki-Warishi, etc., who became people she cherished and people who accepted her for who she is. And so if that wish granting part didn't make sense at the end, this is where my brain was going. Have a Happy New Year! ;3


End file.
